Tough day for Jian’s mama
The fact that we will be leaving China soon is hitting me really hard. Only 2 more full days here before we go to the airport. Jian is doing so great here I wish so badly that we could just push pause and stay a while longer. I don’t want her to have any more difficult transitions. I can imagine that it will hit her hard to be surrounded by only English speaking people who don’t look like her. I will try my best to cook foods she likes but I’m not in the practice of cooking such spicy dishes. I don’t want her to feel intimidated when all the other kids can speak English and already know all the answers in school and Bible class. I don’t want her to be scared at all the doctors and therapy appointments we have scheduled this summer. I also don’t really want her to change. I know that pretty soon I won’t be able to hear her precious little Mandarin chatter. I know that she won’t need me to carry her around everywhere for long. Since I first saw her picture, something inside me changed. This past year has been so full of emotional ups and downs, and I know the year to come will be also. My task will continue to be to live for the present day and to lean on The Lord for strength. My prayer is that this transition will be harder on me than it is on her.